Convincing Ourselves the Real is the Ideal


ISTOCK image in WSJ

Hopeful science thought for the New Year (from Dr. Helen Fisher on via the WSJ):

“Natural selection [favors] those who responded negatively to the one malevolent intruder, rather than positively to myriad friendly guests.”

But, “happily-in-love long-term partners [overlook] the negative to focus on the positive aspects of their marital relationships—… ‘positive illusions.’ … We humans are able to convince ourselves that the real is the ideal.”

“The neural roots of tolerance, mercy and pardon may live deep in the human psyche.”

Happy New Year, especially you who survived and thrived in long-term, loving relationships.

2 thoughts on “Convincing Ourselves the Real is the Ideal

  1. I get the concept of making the real into ideal. Lovely. But not convinced of the either/or concept about natural selection. Seems that both the rejection of one intruder and the acceptance of many could be accurate and exist simultaneously. We all know people who are capable of both behaviors. During a lifetime I suspect people’s behavior fluctuates depending on circumstances. I’m leery of either/or stances.

  2. Of course, that would imply we have no free will (among other things).

    I’m a skeptic of “laws” of human behavior, too.

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